To my small children and probably your small children too.
Mothers Day is coming and I know you are busily making projects at school or you are racking your brains trying to figure out what to do for me on this glorious day. This year I am going to take the mystery out of the gift giving and tell you exactly what I want and perhaps what every mother everywhere has ever wanted. It won’t cost anything but it will take every ounce of effort and will power you have and I know you have a lot. Because I know you, I know that you can accomplish everything on the list and give me the best day ever like you desperately want to. So read carefully and ask questions if needed…I won’t mind.
This is my Mothers Day list.
- If the door is closed, leave me alone. I love you to pieces but there are times when I just need a moment. Sometimes I need a time out. Sometimes I need to think. Sometimes I need to go to the bathroom. If I walk into a room and close the door, unless you are gushing blood or there is an emergency, leave me alone until I come out in my own time. If you have something you have to tell me and you are afraid you will forget, go get a piece of paper and write it down. I will be more than happy to help you when I emerge from my location.
- If I am on the phone, please do not talk to me. I know you are excited about life, your siblings drive you crazy, you can’t find something or you just remembered you have to tell me something and it simply can not wait five minutes while I have my phone call. Trust me I know as I have told you before, I also was kid once. Yes, I know this is hard to believe. I know the inner turmoil you are currently experiencing. However, while I am on the phone is not the time. Please wait until I am done. If your sibling is bothering you, simply walk away. If you have to tell me something, write it down. If you discovered something new, I would love to see it…save it for me. If you can’t find something, start cleaning, I am positive your lost item will show up.
- Please do not whine when I throw away your art work. I know you have worked really hard to make, create or design me something and I truly do love it. I will proudly display it and I may even keep it to show you when you are an adult. However, if I deem it is time to go in the trash and you find it, please do not whine. I simply can not keep everything that you make for me.
- Clean up after yourselves and your siblings…without being asked. I know I fancy myself wonder woman and you think I am this as well, but I will be honest, I am not. I try very hard to hold all the pieces and do everything that I can to help you. Sometimes I just can not do anymore. I am asking that you help me and clean up after yourselves and your younger siblings, without making me say it out loud a million times. Simply know mom doesn’t like finding a trail of your belongings leading me to your location.
- Don’t fight. This is like two gifts in one. Don’t fight with me and don’t fight with your siblings. I am not trying to ruin your life and they are not trying to ruin your life. We all get on each others nerves. Please listen to each other, take a deep breath, try to understand what the other person is telling you and if you can’t, go hide in your room until you are able to do life again.
- Tell me you love me. Children of mine, I love you to the moon and back. I would do anything and give anything for you. The best thing you could ever do for me, is tell me you love me. I screw up and fail a million times a day…probably more. There is no training manual for motherhood and I am desperately trying to figure it out. Some days I got it. Somedays I can’t remember your name, which is why I run down the list of every person known to man and usually end with “what ever kid you are”. Its hard for me and I know its hard for you. Here is what I want you to do; to my toddler, wrap your chunky little arms around me, give me a squishy wet kiss and tell me you love me. To my second grade boy, I know it isn’t cool to hug mom and give me a kiss on the cheek anymore. Those days are long gone and I am in general ok with this. However, today it is ok if you sneak them in when no one is looking, I won’t tell. It will be our secret. To my 9 year old. I know the struggle is real and you think I am the worst mom ever many days, today I ask that you give me a hug, tell me you love me and try to understand that everything I do, I do out of love. Someday we will both understand we are doing the best we can.
- Just hang out with me. You don’t have to make me breakfast in bed…actually I am begging you please don’t. You don’t have to buy me something. You don’t have to make me something. Today I want to just hang out with you. I want to snuggle on the couch and watch a movie, go out for ice cream and have fun all day. I want you to want to do this too. You see this might be the most difficult item on the list because perhaps it is the hardest to make happen. It might be easier for you to find a mythical flying unicorn and give it to me, but today I want to enjoy each other.
Dear sweet children of mine it really isn’t about the specific items on the list or Mothers Day. It is about doing life together everyday with me and everyone else you meet . Sure it would be nice for you to go right down this list and do everything on it but it really is not about that. It is about loving selflessly. It is about trying your hardest. It is about listening carefully and following directions. It is about quality and not quantity. It is knowing that sometimes the best gifts cost nothing. It is learning that sometimes your presence is enough. I simply want you to be the best you, you could ever be. I want you to think back one day, when you are long grown and possibly have your own kids, about the year I asked for seven things, and understand what I really wanted, even if you think I am insane now. One day my children you will understand it was never about me, it was always about teaching you to be the wonderful amazing adult I know you will one day be and that your existence is the best gift I could ever ask for.
I love you,